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Double Standards and Why They Are Undermining Society

6 Years

Phase 3 BOLDER than before…

Welcome To Written Mirror

Greetings and salutations! Salute to OG ‘Mirrorheads’ and welcome aboard to the rookies! Todays topic was always going to be a hot one: Double Standards and Why They Are Undermining Society. Time to dive in like an Olympic medal was on the line…

What Are Double Standards?

I know what you’re thinking; it’s when representatives of two royal houses bearing their respective standards are in close proximity to each other. That was a solid attempt and I applaud you! Better than I could’ve ever come up with on my own! Bravo!

Double standards occur when a set of rules/norms/behaviour is accepted as proper/allowed/correct in most circumstances. In turn these very same actions are seen as improper/disallowed/incorrect when used by others. For instance and I apologise in advance if this is a subpar example, someone using a handshake to seal a deal may be seen as binding by the great majority of people outside the legal community. However, if there is no contract with the terms agreed on paper, it could be seen as naive, amateur, improper and possibly unenforceable depending on the scenario.

Double Standard

Hear me out…

Okay, that was a little foggy, let’s do better. In the world of sport, if an athlete exploits the ‘unwritten’ rules of the game to their advantage it could, and most likely would, be seen as cunning/quick-thinking/will to win or plain old gamesmanship if the player is liked/respected. However, if the same ploy is used by a disliked or unflavoured athlete, the narrative becomes that they are bringing the game/sport into disrepute, they are dishonest or plain old cheating. That is a double standard! I think that was better explained. In my defence, I was beta testing before. Warming up for the live show if you like!

Other Situations Where Double Standards Occur?

The somewhat obvious ones are children mirroring the behaviour of parents. You can’t swear 24-7 and get mad if your child lets rip somewhere like at school. Sure it’s not right and it may be somewhat embarrassing but nonetheless it’s a double standard. Male vs Female, if one behaves in a way socially acceptable to all and the other does exactly the same and gets a totally different reaction, you guessed it; double standard. Although to be perfectly honest, if groups of men begin taking group toilet selfies pulling a pout face on a night out, I’m not defending them! EVER!

Double Standard

That blue though OMG!

Why Are You Talking About This Anyway?

Someone has to! I think we have lost the ability as a society to look at things objectively and with real fairness. Everyone is too busy looking for the angle that fits their own point of view, instead, all we end up with, is cross shouting and a real bank of resentment constantly building up interest.

In my own experiences with the internet and social media especially, there is a real alarming amount of unnecessary, or should I say unhelpful sensitivity that gets in the way of finding solutions. Everyone is up in arms about something, instead of finding out where the common ground is and how to prevent further escalation. ‘Where do we start?’ is almost exclusively replaced with ‘Ooh get em!’. We can never tell lapse in judgement from real intent to cause harm/humiliation/defraud etc. anymore because we don’t dig deep enough as a society. We go straight to outrage and ‘CANCELLING’. How does that solve anything?

A: It doesn’t but it feels great! 

JM: Then you wonder why everyone throws out these token apologies. It’s because they allow those harping on to feel like they’ve been forced into submission. Guess what? It’s a survival tactic! You win the battle in your minds while the war wages on with lessons on conduct safely integrated to form a better antagonist…

What Can You Do?

WE have to do better than this! Me, you, your friends, family and even the people who hate us!

All I see throughout society are new factions. In America Republican vs Democrat is now even further sub categorised into racial sensibilities, able bodied vs disabled, educated vs ignorant etc. It really ought to have a lesser bearing on politics, but there you are.

Athlete vs Media. You’re both apart of the same business. It’s supposed to be about global impact and spreading messages which ought to always be about inspirational/motivational/odds defying greatness and connection with something bigger. Talk show host vs Actor/Musician/Reality TV Stars. Again you need each other. Why are you constantly infighting over petty squabbles that don’t deserve to see the light of day? Female vs Female on who is doing it the right/best/purest way. Why undermine what is already a hard journey by trying to destroy your only peers? There has to be common ground between you; help each not fight each other! Open that lane wide enough for others to get on!

Why is it taking someone without the platform and access to the resources you take for granted to be able to see the bigger picture? You want to be seen as leaders then LEAD! At the moment all roads lead to a massive pile of shaving cream…

Double Standard

See the beauty in life not the reasons for strife…

What About That Moment?

Which one specifically? Cardi and Nicki? Serena and the Umpire? Naomi and the Crowd? I’m losing track here! Everyone is going at someone for something or the other.

Tennis

Look I try to stay away from talking about people’s mind and heart. Some officials in sports are just irritants. They want so badly to be the centre of attention. This is nothing new and yes, while it is frustrating if you’re favourite is at the receiving end of it, pointing to anything other than the character on display is problematic.

This particular official seemingly wants to be seen and remembered. Man, woman or child I doubt you get a different personality out of him. The idea of a back and forth not usually escalating that far that quickly is valid! The minute you lean over into other intangible arguments is when a lot of people lose the ability to reason properly. Like I mentioned earlier, they find the angle that applies to them and it’s a wrap for pragmatism. He is a quick off the draw official, that is all it is for me.

Could he have been better? Obviously in a grand slam final!

Beef

As for two female rappers warring? When it’s the guys it’s beef and rivalry. Now it’s someone being a bully/hoodrat and the other being classy/dignified etc. Go away! Huge red flag of a double standard. Fans of rap love and welcome beef, we (I’m including myself if that’s okay) just don’t want it spilling into violence that costs other people. Certain things are off limits, but in lyrical terms there are no rules of engagement.

Putting hands on each other is just not smart legally. That’s not somewhere you can go, and most people recognise that, so why don’t you? There is no female MC code different to the male, if you rap you know what can come your way if your energy is off or people sense you’re not where you are by merit.

Disclaimer

The above are general observations I am not disparaging anyone. I am just saying what usually instigates beef is a high level of familiarity. Both parties knowing each other well, or knowing each others processes/potential/discography well enough for there to be conflict. Then when you add someone giving out the wrong soundbite; it’s flame on!

How Do We Solve Double Standards?

Thanks for reminding me what we’re here for (double standards) , I got distracted for a moment!

It’s simple in my eyes, but in practice it may be difficult for some to make the mental transition. Here it is! It’s either a standard for all or there is no standard! The moment you can reconcile with this line of thinking, all potential for double standards becomes near enough obsolete. Not all that radical I know, but if you wouldn’t like something for yourself then don’t do it to others!

If you have done or witnessed someone doing it without quarrel, then the next time it’s done to you, chalk it up to karma instead of fussing. If you now realise that you have been wrong in your deportment, apologise or make amends going forwards. Reverse the trend if it’s something you’ve implemented on a wide scale.

No one is perfect and we all irritate someone somewhere, that’s just life. What we are definitely in control of, is taking responsibility or thinking things through instead of doubling down (no pun intended). Try to leave the world a little better than when you came into it. It’s not that big of a deal once we all reconnect with the idea of bettering the world instead of dividing it.

Double Standard

Spread love always

Thank You For Sitting Through This

As always much respect to each and every person that supports the content. Written Mirror is always about the truth and being fearless with it. If you’re here that means a part of you is too! Steel sharpens steel and you’re looking very sharp! Until next time…

About Jay Mullings

The best writer you have never heard of! According to some of his peers at least. Jay is all about TRUTHFUL FEARLESS CREATIVITY. His tenacity and eye for detail have so far resulted in over 25 writing awards, The Thought Book Series and Written Mirror clothing. He plans to build upon his ever growing resume by completing his documentary THE JAM over the next few months. Jay is currently looking for a literary agent. He can be found on IMDB,  Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.

Join the discussion 4 Comments

  • Rome says:

    This is a sticky topic. I think double standards will forever be a part of human thinking. People in general are not very objective by nature, we always look to find a common thread that ties us to any given situation and we tend to favor whomever we feel we identify with… unless the situation in a way affects all ppl involved. Men identify with other men on some issues and women will identify with other women which can become a man vs woman issue or child vs parent one race vs another etc. Its crazy because we are in a time when everyone says they want equality for all but that’s not true, not all the time. There are some instances where different elements cause the double standard to override any logic… For instance, i used to work at a retail company overnight off loading the nightly shipments of new products and there were about 5 men and 3 women on the team. There were specific tasks given to different ppl but you could tell it was mostly based on whether you were a man or a woman. Men did the more physical labor and they women did other tasks that were not so physical, both the men and women get paid the same and we all worked under the same job title but there was just some things that the men did and the women didn’t. Now being how i was raised i would never see a woman lifting something heavy and not offer to do it instead so i understood this logic but i distinctly remember one co-worker complaining about the fact that we all got paid the same money so there should be no preferences as far as who does what… objectively speaking I understood what he meant but his comments were definitely frowned upon by the team.

    • Jay Mullings says:

      Wow! I think you need a blog of your own! This comment was hall of fame worthy! Hit the nail on the head, set the roof up for hurricane season, stocked up on tinned goods and everything in-between! LMAO!
      Definitely a sticky topic and your reasoning is absolutely spot on in terms of it being natural to search for something to identify with. The age of equality hey! Where everyone wants the bits of it they like while rejecting the rest! The example of heavy lifting is a very poignant one as it is one of the parts of a job that is often exclusively delegated to men and sometimes it goes even deeper to the stronger framed men which is not very fair at all. I remember working at the olympics and having to take cases of water from the staff office on the ground floor up about 3 quite long flights of stairs to the broadcast area. It was supposed to be an exercise in equality, the idea being that if everyone took one case up in the morning, one after lunch and left one in the evening it would be done fairly. Guess who always swerved that? Haha the girls! I used to take 2-3 up in one go and I would go back for the rest just so it was done. Let me ask you a question, can true equality exist or should we just accept that there are some things/scenarios that don’t necessarily call for it? Bonus question, is the equality topic/debate a way of controlling/manipulating the attention of the masses?

      • Rome says:

        Haha, thanks man but i think I’ll leave the blogging to you for now. I don’t know what being truly equal would mean because equal to me means the same in every regard, no more no less. We as people are all different, we come in different sizes, colors etc. so it think it’s almost impossible to make all things equal for everyone. There is a saying that I like to use “EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE” so something that is a challenge for me may not be a challenge to you and vice versa, heavy to you may not be heavy to the next person. I saw a post online yesterday and it was a striking image, it was a photo of some people on the New York City subway and it showed a woman around 50 years old standing in front of a seat with about 8 men sitting there. The caption said “what is wrong with this picture” meaning that none of the men offered to stand and let the lady have their seat. Now I understand what the image is saying and I personally would have offered her my seat, however there have been times I’ve seen men offer seats to women and the women rarely say no. In the image i think a few of the men were construction workers based on there attire (so they were coming from a long physical day of work), is it fair that they are expected to feel less tired simply because they are men? I think everyone should get the same respect but we have to consider that there are some differences that just cannot be overlooked for the sake of making some feel better. Can you picture how society would chastise a man who got a woman pregnant and then when she had the baby he stays home and takes care of the household and she went to work because she had a better job and made more money? Within reason i think some thing should be a lot more equal like the justice system here in America for example, the way some people are treated vs others is extremely disturbing. If black people march in protest over multiple instances of police brutality with a lack of punishment they get labeled as thugs but when a mob of white men leaving a sporting event start a riot and damage property worth hundreds of thousands of dollars then they are labeled just drunk and disorderly…. I don’t know if it is a tactic to manipulate the masses because it is a very broad topic that covers a variety of issues and affects people from every background in some way so whenever the topic is brought up everyone wants to get involved.

        • Jay Mullings says:

          Some very poignant points here! I like the way you put it, EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE. Very true and I also think that true equality is an ideal more than an ambition. People often want the bits of equality that suit them while rejecting everything else. The seat on the train thing is interesting for real as a picture and a caption can’t necessarily give you the entire story. Keep your head up man! Some really insightful information in your thought patterns!

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